You Oughta Know

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I think my soft spot was left irresponsibly in the open when I was a child because I feel so slow at very specific times in life. Most often when I never know if I’m on a date.

*single blink*

While you may be able to deduce where you are or are not and what you are or are not doing, I. Never Know.  Sometimes I’m out with a boy and I’m fully thinking this is a date – like, romantic intent is happening inside my belly and across the table. But I’m wrong because I’m soon helping him decode the conversation he had with his girlfriend the night prior.  Other times, I’m fully hanging out with my friend and upon saying our goodbyes, I’m slowly removing his lips from neck. Lips I didn’t ask for nor want.  Is it my intent that is misplaced? Am I just not getting it? Should I immediately switch my brain to “Oh, this is ON!” mode even though I’m not feeling it one little bit? I just can’t bring myself to believe it works this way. Am I completely oblivious?

Are you supposed to ask what type of hang out the hang out is? I mean, I can hang out and be breezy and just let things be but if I agree to “hang” with someone under false pretences, how is that fair to anyone?  I get together with many friends, my ladies, my dudes, my gays and we all use the same terminology.

If a date is a date there shouldn’t be any doubt…right?!

Finally! (Introducing @DJJOOCE, @DJMAKEM & @mensathedj)

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My WordPress account is back up and running. The constant technical glitches threw a wrench in my countdown plans so this isn’t a “countdown” post but a super-quick introduction to the remaining 3 DJs scheduled to take the state at the Red Bull Thre3Style Regional Qualifier: Toronto THIS Thursday (Sept. 26th).  I won’t leave any man behind. HERE WE GO!

INTRODUCING @DJJOOCE

INTRODUCING @DJMAKEM

An industry veteran, DJ MAKEM has rocked crowds from coast to coast. For years MAKEM has displayed his innovative, original, party-rocking skills shutting down parties and leaving crowds wanting more. His style of versatility and originality keeps him in popular demand- it’s no wonder world renowned artists such as A-Trak, Skratch Bastid, and Neil Armstrong have shared the stage with him!!  Check out his HOMECOMING MIX below:

INTRODUCING @MENSATHEDJ

From the smallest of lounges to thousands in attendance, Mensa has brought parties to life across Canada, the US, and his native Philippines. Smooth mixing paired with a turntablist’s sensibility make his sound hard to duplicate, and has quickly made him one of Toronto’s favorite DJ’s. At every party, Mensa makes it a personal affair, creating on-the-spot mixes tailored to the vibe of every occasion.

Check out my current favourite mix he’s put out called “Light Work.” I’m pretty sure my future offspring will be conceived to this mix. “LIGHT WORK”: http://www.djmensa.com/mixes/djmensa_lightwork.mp3

Neither Makem or Mensa are strangers to the Thre3style competition, both are previous title holders of the Toronto qualifiers so this will be an exciting night all around.  Will it go to a previous winner or will a brand-new Tdot king be crowned?

Only one way to find out!  I have your “free before 10pm” passes for this Thursday so do not hesitate to shoot me a message to singleblinkblog@gmail.com to grab one. Or you can buy your tickets here: www.ticketweb.ca/rb3style.

More info on all three DJs can be found at their respective sites:

DJ JOOCE

MAKEM

MENSA

DAY 21 & 22 – Too Many DJs (Introducing @What_IF65 & @MRockGotBeats)

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Sorry for skipping a day, friends but life caught up to me.  BACK TO THE MUSICS!  Here’s a double-dose of your Toronto qualifying DJs:

WHO IS WHATIF?

Photo Cred: Nick Haight

Ian Flemming aka. DJ WhatIF, is an up and coming DJ hailing from Toronto Ontario. With his Hip-Hop roots and distinct scratching skills, he has already managed to create a signature live experience that resonates with his audience. WhatIF has packed dance floors across Central Canada including Wrongbar, The Social, Andy Poolhall, The Dardanella and more. His live sets vary in style, from Hip-Hop and Dirty South to House and Dubstep, keeping crowds constantly on their feet. In his first year professionally Djing alone, he has managed to play with notable acts such as Designer Drugs, Grandtheft (Team Canada DJ’s), Hotmess DJ’s, DJ BLASTER (Montreal’s legendary hip hop DJ) Trypt, Mack Browne and DJ Medley (The Z-List). Only time will tell what happens to this rising artist.

Well, we can add making the Red Bull Thre3style qualifiers to his ever-growing list of accomplishments, can we not?!

Check out his mix right here:

WHO IS M-ROCK?

Photo cred: Camila Mendes

 

(Selected excerpts taken from DJMROCK.com)

“I used to make webpages to build careers, and now I think they make my career” says the well-rounded DJ and ex-web developer, who is always booked to DJ in an open-format.

Since 2010, he’s filled the dancefloor for clients such as Ryan Gosling, Shaquille O‘ Neal, Drake and fashion designer Marc Ecko, who have all complimented him personally at the DJ booth. The biggest reward was performing in front of his idols like DJ Premier at Scion’s King of Beats competition in New York.

It’s much more than just DJing and composing. Miami‘s Winter Music Conference asked him to host his own panel on his invention ‘Digital Juggling’ – a style of DJing that fuses turntablism and pianist-style keystrokes on the laptop. 

COTDAMN! “Digital Juggling,” you say? *single blink*  Aight, I’m impressed.

I spent most of last night listening to both of these DJs mixtapes and remixed tracks over and over again.  I sound like a broken record (#sorrynotsorry for the idiom usage) but I’m SO ecstatic for this event. These DJs are not pulling any punches so I can only imagine what they’ll be like in battle mode.

Follow WhatIF:

• Twitter
• SoundCloud

Follow DJ M-ROCK:

•  DJMROCK.COM
•  Facebook
•  Twitter
•  YouTube
•  Instagram
•  Mixcrate
•  Mixcloud

Catch both WhatIF & M-Rock LIVE at Red Bull Thre3Style Regional Qualifier: Toronto on Sept. 26th. Get your tickets at www.ticketweb.ca/rb3style. See you when we’re the sweatiest on the dance floor!

DAY 23 – Great DJ (Introducing @KidMK)

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WHO IS KID MK?

Photo cred: Paul Swanson

I tried to use my social media cunning to grab info on Kid MK and came up with nothing. I’m thinking the “MK” should just stand for “Mystery Kid” because I can’t find his back story. It would appear he wants the music to speak for itself and with good reason. (Also, I could’ve just asked him BUT I DIGRESS!!!!!!!) Let’s SoundCloud together, y’all!

Sigh! These mixes are providing me with hours and hours of joy. I wish my iPod shuffled this sweetly. I always get stuck in a D.U.T.T.Y. Limp Bizkit/KISS/William Shatner/50s Lounge Instrumentals-blackhole it can’t seem to get out of.  Do you know how much MJ, Elbow, Leadbelly, NIN and Tribe I have on my iPod, why doesn’t it shuffle that?!  *single blink* Probably because it knows I can gets what I needs from Kid MK.

Hmmm……

Maybe I should attack this from a different angle. What likeable things did the internet teach me about Kid MK?:

• When “The Newsroom” doesn’t air, he gets Hulk-ish
• He, as well as so many of us, were stuck in a space-time continuum of Kendrick’s “Control” verse and just wanted answers
• He understands the importance, and recognizes the nostalgia, of a well-placed 90s alternative track

He’s just like you and me, folks. Except he’s a (whiz) Kid on them tables. (See what I did there???) I’m just scratching the surface, obviously. I’m not a producer or a professional music critic. I just know what I like and my ears likey all o’dis.  I’m going to keep bugging him for more information until I see his set at Red Bull Thre3Style Regional Qualifier: Toronto (SEPT.  26TH).  Get your tickets at www.ticketweb.ca/rb3style.

Until then, follow him on all the necessary platforms: Facebook, Twitter & SoundCloud.

DAY 24 – Play (Introducing @DJIntrinity)

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WHO IS DJ INTRINITY?

(Excerpts below YOINKED from djintrinity.com)

DJ Intrinity was born into a family of Disc Jockeys and music lovers. Trini (Trinidadian) at heart, it was only natural that he started entertaining a mature Caribbean clientele at the young age of 11, with his older brother, best friend and mentor, Sylvester “DJ Lee” Francis (1975-2001).

Driven by a passion and an unconditional love and appreciation for all genres of music, this young DJ’s incomparable talents has led him to play not only at most of the major venues in Toronto, but Festivals and events in major cities across North America and the Caribbean, including; Toronto, LA, Hollywood, Miami, Atlanta, Boston and New York. Intrinity has also headlined at the same venues as some of the world’s top acts, such as; Drake, LMFAO, Avicii, Deadmau5 & Justin Bieber, to name a few.

While Intrinity plays all genres of music, I really enjoy the amount of house and electro he infuses into his mixes. I hope the audience pays close attention to him; I have a feeling he’s got something different to throw at us. I can see why he made the top 8. He has the experience to take this opportunity in stride, the chops to give his seven competitors a run for their money and the drive to not go down without firing on all cylinders.

My instincts say his set at Red Bull Thre3Style Regional Qualifier: Toronto (September 26th, don’t forget to RSVP) is going to be next and I’m getting pretty excited ’bout it. I’m not envying the judges right about now.  At all.  But you brought this on yourselves!!! *single blink* Just sayin’.

Stay in the know with DJ Intrinity:

WEBSITE
http://djintrinity.com/

TWITTER
http://twitter.com/djintrinity

MUSIC/MIXES
http://djintrinity.com/mixes
http://soundcloud.com/djintrinity

YOUTUBE
http://youtube.com/intrinityTV

DAY 25 – D.J. Keep Playin’ (Introducing @djdsmooth)

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I was lucky enough to get a few of the qualifying Toronto DJs to follow me on Twitter so I took FULL advantage of this direct contact.  D-Smooth was the first to get back to me with some links to his mixes.  While he made suggestions, I had a field day going through his site, http://www.upjumpsdaboogie.com.

WHO IS D-SMOOTH?

(Below stolen from UpJumpsDaBoogie.com)

Derrick M., otherwise known as D-Smooth, is a Toronto, Canada, based Disc Jockey (DJ) that has created an illustrious career, by playing the hottest hits at venues across Canada. Through hard work, Derrick has positioned himself to be a highly prized DJ, by garnishing the respect of his industry peers.

Since 1995, D-Smooth has been performing at private parties, corporate events and at different nightclubs, demonstrating his extraordinary talent of seamlessly mixing and blending a wide range of genres from Hip Hop, Rock, R&B, Soul, House, Reggae, Electro and Dance. As a pioneer to the online game, D-Smooth transformed the way music was consumed, by streaming live-recorded mixes on the Internet for his loyal online list of hungry enthusiasts. In 2003, D created upjumpsdaboogie.com to house his critically acclaimed classic mix tapes such as; “A tribute to fallen artists”, “Real Smooth”, “General Consensus” and “Ear Candy” and as well as a venue to his live mixes. Since then, D-Smooth has built an impressive resume, by launching countless episodes of mixes and podcasts that further grew his online following…

I cannot tell you the joy this brought me. First of all, Biggie. Second of all, Aaliyah. Third of all, The Beatles.  A DJ after my cold, black (racial) heart will be able to mix all the things I love, and maybe some things I never paid attention to, into a casserole of jam perfection.  THIS mix right here……so effin’ breezy!

 

I will definitely be sharing more of my favourites I discovered of his (PLEASE NOTE: he has a remix entitled “Beyonce – Party.” *single blink*  So you know where I’ll be living for the next few hours on repeat. I’m just saying you can’t remix Queen Bey and have me not lose m’damn mind.)

 

Why I dig what D-Smooth is doing?

I dig any artist/DJ/musician/producer who has a vast musical reference mind-library & D-Smooth can take this title for the following reasons:

• the element of surprise will work in your favour
• diversity in genres, riddims, eras – that’s what keeps an audience wanting more

If you’re taking liberties to mix Nirvana into Amy Winehouse, then your brain works on a whole. notha. level and I’m living for it.

 

Watch D-Smooth go for the Tdot crown at the Red Bull Thre3Style Regional Qualifier: Toronto on Sept. 26th.  RSVP here!

D-Smooth Info:

http://www.upjumpsdaboogie.com

https://www.facebook.com/djdsmoothboogie

https://twitter.com/djdsmooth

https://soundcloud.com/djdsmooth

 

DAY 26 – D.J.’s Get No Credit

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DAY 26 – D.J.’S GET NO CREDIT

…and Red Bull Thre3style gon’ change all of that. #fact

As into music as I am, I was not as well-versed on the DJ scene as I’d like to be. This changed IMMEDIATELY upon hearing that Red Bull Thre3style is bringing the world finals to Toronto. Ya, y’heard me! Every single qualifying DJ from around the world is going to descend upon MY hometown in November to spin, scratch and leave their sweat onstage with the most diverse sets you’ll ever hear in one spot.

Four Color Zack takes the 2012 Red Bull Thre3Style Championship Title at Metro Chicago

Whatchu know about Four Color Zack (@Fourcolorzack)?

Four Color Zack is the current Red Bull Thre3style title holder and for every good cotdamn reason. Also, a super nice dude! I implore y’all get your lives with FCZ’s winning set below.

*single blink* 

O………….K! Stevie? The Rocky Theme? Rihanna? The Ramones? 50 Cent? Bruce Springsteen? A-ha?! What the actual f*ck just happened in 15 minutes?! (Watch his set here!)

I could copy and paste every write-up I’ve read on FCZ and why I think he’s sickening as f*ck but I’m pretty sure your non-stop moving bampsy while listening to this is all you’ll ever need to know (please note: I’m listening to him as I write this post).

WHAT IS RED BULL THRE3STYLE?

Courtesy of www.redbullthre3style.com

How dope is this?!! AAAAAH! I can’t tell you how excited I am for this competition. It’s like the gods read my diary and created an entire competition based on the things I find sexiest: music & men (not that this competition is closed to women, SHOUTOUT TO DJ RAYRAY <3, but let’s be serious about MY needs). Every single day until the Toronto qualifiers (Sept. 26th), I’ll be counting down all my favourite things about Thre3style focusing on past winners, the 8 qualifying Toronto DJs (D-SMOOTH, INTRINITY, JOOCE, KID MK, M-ROCK, MAKEM, MENSA & WHATIF) and mixes from the known-to-the-unknown DJs who’ve all been part of taking this competition to a global soundstage.

SB DISCLAIMER: Everyone has a Red Bull opinion, I hear it on the daily.  Please trust me when I say, I’m not here for it. If you’re thinking of providing your negative two cents, I’d think twice about leaving it here. I’m surrounding myself with good & positive vibes and no one can deny the Shaquille O’Neal-sized cultural footprints this company is leaving behind.  Red Bull Thre3style is simply another amazing example of this.

Let me know what you think of FCZ’s set!  Make sure you RSVP to the Ontario regional qualifiers this month (Facebook links below):

Red Bull Thre3style Regional Qualifier: Ottawa – September 21
Red Bull Thre3style Regional Qualifier: Toronto – September 26

To follow Four Color Zack, here are the links you need:
www.soundcloud.com/fourcolorzack
www.twitter.com/fourcolorzack
www.instagram.com/fourcolorzack
www.fourcolorzack.com

This Is The Song That Doesn’t End

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This is an oldie but a goodie.

This is a real vm message (transcribed word for word) that I received on January 1, 2011. And this is not a collection of voicemails, this is a single message left on my phone. I was Swinger’d**, if you’ve seen the movie …you will understand. I suggest on your break or lunch to find a place to read this out loud or if easier, find someone you can read it too.  It is exponentially more hilarious and ridiculous when you don’t read it in your head. TRUST ME and enjoy!!!

“Hi Arianne – it’s Jesse calling. How are you? We met at the thing last night. Happy New Year. I hope you’re well. I hope you slept off the intense hangover from all the Jack Daniels *snickers* Um…anyway, it was really nice meeting. I really liked you. I thought you were really neat. You were definitely the saving grace of the party. When you left it was so boring. Man. everybody left – not just me. Everybody did after you left. Look at that, you killed the party…heh heh heh. Anyway, it was really nice meeting you and really hope we do get together for coffee or something. Now I thought that if you were really feeling adventurous we could have lunch. Wouldn’t that be neat? You know, I don’t want to freak you out on a first date so coffee’s ok. Anyway, I would really like to talk to you so I hope you call me back. Um….I….actually remember most of our conversation believe it or not, I really was actually not that drunk. I just was really just spilling my drink on you out of clumsiness. But uh…anyway, I would really like to learn more and uh, give you a chance to know more about me and see if you think I’m cool. And if you don’t wear five-inch heels, you’ll have a better shot *snicker* cuz I can’t wear five-inch heels and get away with it. Anyway, I should leave you my phone number shouldn’t I? I have an unlisted number because I do the EMS stuff and I have a drop-in center for troubled youth so I need my number to be unlisted, um but uh, it doesn’t mean that the people I want to can’t have it. Um….you can pretty much reach me any time because I don’t sleep and I do weird EMS stuff in the middle of the night. Anyway, whenever. You can call me whenever it doesn’t matter. Um…if I don’t answer leave a message and I’ll give you a call back. My number is <insert number here>. That’s <insert number (again) here>. Um…and it’s a new phone and I’m not sure if it’s working well or not, whatever. So I’ll say it one more time, <insert number thricely here>.  And it’s Jesse for Arianne. Hope to talk to you soon. I’m going out tonight to a coffee shop near me. Shisha bar actually. A coffee shop. Doing some drawing; working on some sketches. Um so if you call me in the evening I’ll be around, I can take your call. Um if you do want to come draw, you’re more than welcome. Um…but you have to be able to draw to come otherwise, no coffee. *snickers* Anyway, I’ll be out probably from 9 o’clock on. Until then, I should be available I think. Um and uh…yeah, ok, take care. This is too long a message, isn’t it? Jesse, we met last night. Talk to you soon. Happy New Year.”

*single blink*

**A clip from “Swingers”:

Signs

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Like most evenings when I’m unable to take my sleeping pill, I lay in the neverending darkness of my room and try to make sense of my love life. CORRECTION: I try to make sense of my vacuous romantic existence.  The other night I began thinking about the early signs to the demise of certain relationships.  A friend of mine always reminded me of a saying her grandmother would tell her: “You’re going to keep pickin’ ’til you pick sh!t.”

Well ain’t that the muhfuggin’ truth. Catch all of the Ts from my last conversation with myself:

There was this guy I used to see, sleep with, let inside my home…however you want to slice it. All I can tell you is that we weren’t dating nor was he my man. Obviously. Here’s how my idiot mind works: I make a mental note of the thing that drives me batty about the person. I ask myself if I can see a lifetime of this anger-inducing trait without stabbing them in the throat. The answer to this question has never not been “No. No I can’t.”  Why don’t I listen to my gut? It’s clearly trying to tell me something, right? If some minute detail is bugging me about this otherwise normal dude, then I really don’t want to be in anything with them. Why do I stick around for the anguish? Pourquoi.

So back to this dude. The thing I couldn’t stand was the way he ate and drank. He was the loudest chewer/swallower in the history of time and also the land before that. I cannot stress how much this annoyed my insides. You may say, “Slow down, girl. Could it really be that bad?”  To which I reply:

“Yes, heifer…it was.”

He didn’t eat with his mouth open. He didn’t slurp his food or drink. He didn’t even smack his lips.  Yet somehow I could hear every tooth he had in his head grind the sustenance in his mouth into a dust and/or paste while the sound of his neck muscles pushed it down into his digestive system.

*single blink*  Guys. GUYS?! GUYS!  I couldn’t. Just typing this is making bile rise in my throat. (BUT YOU CAN’T HEAR IT so I win!)

When things finally fizzled between us (for other reasons, can you believe it?), do you know what I did? I victory-jumped off my bed because I’d never have to hear him crunch pasta. Yes, crunch it. How can I hear you bite into a stove-top boiled, soft penne tube? I’m eating the same food. Mine is silent and I have a direct speaker into my own body. If I can’t hear me, why can I hear you? IF-I-CAN’T-HEAR-ME-WHY-CAN-I-HEAR-YOU!?!!!!?!?  *faints*

Well, I’m still single so maybe I’ll work on this in the interim but in my defense, it was really gross.

She Blinded Me With Science

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I performing an experiment after a friend date last week. We briefly discussed if I’d ever go back to online dating or if I was truly done with it. Without hesitation I told her I was done. We can all agree that was the best bread and butter of my blog, right? (Alliteration and bread referenced in a sentence almost made me climax just now…. *single blink*)

When I got home, her question stuck with me. Online dating has been a constant for the majority of my adult life – am I over it? Here’s the full experiment run-down:

1. Rejoin one free online dating site for two weeks (I began last Sunday)
2. Don’t phone it in; make a legit profile
3. If I receive any messages, engage in conversation without sabotage
4. At 11:59PM on Saturday, August 3rd, delete profile

My hypothesis is I’ll be more than happy to be rid of the profile. My fear is I’ll hesitate removing my profile because of my forever dependency.  So far, I’ve reconnected with someone I spoke to on another site several years ago and he remembered my name! I had no idea who he was, I’m still murky on details I just remember his name. Of course he is still online. His game…I can’t even with it.

There was a promising second person who caught my interest until he didn’t because he’s an idiot.

One more week…

Thank Christ…I think the spell is broken.