I Can See Clearly Now

Please press play: 

I came to a realization the other day. It may seem super obvious to y’all but for me it was a direct blow to the reality node in my brain.

I have ALWAYS had this issue with men who were able to finagle their way into my place for the “at-home second date” experience. It felt like they didn’t want to put in any effort to actually woo a chick (I am that chick).  And with good reason! My success rate in the getting-to-know-you phase with at-home dates result in every date thereafter being in my home. I HATE IT. Take me out! Let’s go for a walk! For a drink! For push-ups…I really don’t care.  But you’re chilling at my house, eating my food, drinking my drinks, watching my DVDs, playing my Nintendo and driving up my hydro bill (not really, but you get my point). They’ve brought nothing to this date other than their two long arms and ridiculous ‘bedspectations.’  You can’t bring a bag of chips? *single blink*

So the realization…  Okay, take everything I said before and apply it to a guy I’m ACTUALLY interested in and I ONLY want to spend time indoors away from the world watching tv, cutting crusts off sandwiches, making the dude feel as comfortable as possible. I become fully domesticated…and I LOVE IT. Let’s wear TSBs (Track Suit Bottoms) and drink soda in wine glasses! Let’s put music on the turntable and have a full-fledged sock hop in my living room! Let’s choose a turrible romance novel from my library and read random chapters to each other and laugh while the ice cream cake is softening for consumption! Yes, lets!!!

This will now be my official barometer: if you don’t bring out the domestic goddess within me, then I need to stop fooling myself. YOU SHALL NOT PASS….the threshold of my condo.


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