Celebrity

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#9 - DON’T post photos of celebrities claiming it’s you or photos WITH celebrities and using only their face in your cropped thumbnail.

As I said on Monday, I have a slightly higher pop-culture reference point than the average person. My brain is where Nick at Nite goes to die and I’m happy with this.

I’ve seen photos from obscure to A-list:

• Max Hodges (resident TMZer)
• Chris Powell (Personal Trainer)
• George Stroumboulopoulos (I EFFIN’ WISH!)
• Will Smith
• Adrien Brody

Are you Adrien Brody or aren’t you?! 

There’s not much to say here. Don’t do it. I’m the opposite of everything NIKE stands for and I’m okay with that too. Post photos of you and not someone who is not you claiming it’s you. If you look like a celebrity and you feel the need to mention it, it’s your prerogative but don’t use that celebrity’s picture.

DISCLAIMER: On few, and I mean VERY few occasions, I’ve called someone out on their photo and they were actually who they had in their image. We had a good laugh. But by few occasions, I mean two.

The odds will never be in your favour. *single blink*

Spice Up Your Life

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It has been awhile since my last BODY LANGUAGE WEDNESDAY, so I figured I’d grace your eyes with another male characteristic that sets my loins on fiyah.

MEN WITH SALT & PEPPER HAIRS!

George Clooney

Like Tevin Campbell, CAN WE TALK for a dyam minute about George Clooney and dese ya tings ‘pon ‘is ‘eadtop??? (Translation: Let’s have a chat for a moment about George Clooney and the hair atop his noggin?)  *single blink* This man and his beauty (he will appear in many more Body Language Wednesdays) will always stand the test of time according to my clock. Everything about him has aged like the stinkiest cheese (because those are always the best!) Paging Dr. Douglas Ross, Ari’s gotta a fevah!

Will Smith

I’m unsure if you know, friends, but Will Smith has been going grey for yeeeeeeears and I love it. I love every last speckle in his hair. I think it suits him. I think it adds something more to his look that he never had before. I need him to come out with a new movie so I can bask in the silvery glimmer of his follicles.

Patrick Dempsey

I can’t.

Pierce Brosnan

I GODDAMN WON’T!

Until next time, spicy boys…

The First Time Ever I Saw Your Face

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**BODY LANGUAGE WEDNESDAYS**

Full House is a classic, right?  Well, my brother and I never missed an episode. We particularly enjoyed the character, (Uncle) Jesse Katsopolis. Me, because he was beautiful and filled me with Greek dreams. My brother, ‘cuz he was cool and Ladies Loved U.J. Together, we figured out his mojo. Whilst watching an episode (probably a scene where Jesse was holding back tears during some kinda one-on-one time with Michelle), it clicked! We coined the term: Chewer’s Jaw. Chewer’s Jaw is that distinct line that appears when one clamps down on their back teeth. John Stamos was not the first to possess this, but he’s what made it ‘in fashion’ for me. I’d follow my brother to the Circle K at the top of my street; he’d buy several bags of Big League Chew and begin jaw muscle workouts. I mean, that had to be how John got such a defined jawline, isn’t it? Chewing copious amounts of gum? I don’t know how my bro doesn’t suffer from TMJ right now.

Over the years, the list of celebrity men with Chewer’s Jaw grew. A few of my top desired jaws:

• Rob Lowe
• James Marsters
• Brad Pitt
• Heath Ledger
• David Beckham
• Will Smith
• and Ryan Phillippe

But my heart…will ALWAYS…belong to STAMOS!

Have Mercy

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