Have A Heart

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I hope you’ve seen this video before, but if you haven’t… I present to you:

HANDSOME MEN’S CLUB

On this Valentine’s Day, I’m using the power of my *single blinks* to IMPLORE Jimmy Kimmel to do another edition. Here are my suggestions for HMC Part Deux (in no particular order):

Tony Goldwyn

Tom Hardy

Tank

Ryan Gosling

Robert Downey, Jr.

Paul Rudd

John Taylor

John Stamos

Jeremy Renner

Jared Leto

Idris Elba

The Hemsworth Brothers (Liam & Chris)

David Beckham

Daniel Craig

Brad Pitt

Adam Levine

To think of the possibilities of all these men being in the same room at the same time made my loins the equivalent of a mouthful of cinnamon hearts a.k.a. set on fire. IMAGINE?!

I may not have a sweetie to call my own tonight. I may be watching “Untamed Heart” on VHS and bawling into a bowl of froze grapes for dinner. I may EVEN put men’s cologne and a baseball cap on my body pillow just to feel something real for one night. But the possibility of another HMC sketch would make everything right with the world.

So, Mr. Kimmel, this is my Valentine’s Day wish. Please have a heart and make this happen again…for me.

Sincerely,

@Bettykiss

Make ‘Em Laugh!

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With the conclusion of JFL42 behind me, I feel incomplete. The last two weeks were THE best because comedy was at the ultimate forefront of  my mind. I. Love. To. Laugh. I like to laugh loudly until it hurts. I like to make people laugh (hence this blog). I feel I need to give back to the community so this week will be strictly based around comedy in our fair city of Toronto, because trust me…there are goodies you don’t EVEN know about.

I will let you in on all my funny people crushes in this city – some I know, some I don’t…so this will get REAL weird if it gets back to them. But I regret nothing! *single blink* I will tell you what they do, where they perform, maybe even post a photo or 12! I will do the stalking for you so you don’t have to be uncomfortable at all.

How does ALL O’DIS relate to this blog? Well, for me, there’s nothing more attractive than someone’s ability to make me laugh. I will instantly fall for you/want to be your BFF if you can do this.  So I hope you enjoy what’s about to come this week and maybe I’ll see you at a show, where we will swoon and drool in solidarity.

“Hey Girl…laughter is the music of the soul, so let’s harmonize.” BOOM!

COMEDIANS!!!

Body Language

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**BODY LANGUAGE WEDNESDAYS**

Today I’d like to salute one of my favourite parts of a man: THE FOREARM. I’ve had many discussions on this topic which normally conclude with me fainting from ‘the vapours,’ but I’m typing and can take as many breaks as I require.

The forearm, GODDAMN! This feature on a man ends my life. I’m not attracted to a Popeye arm nor does Gollum put my panties in a twist…there is a place on middle Earth where these bearers of the ultimate forearms reside. This could be why I love the looks of a blue-collared gent. Their lives of manual labour have toned their appendages to a level approved by me and my loins.

May the corded muscles responsible for your unspoken power be covered with the supplest of skin and lightest sprinkling of hairs.

PRAISE BE TO THE FOREARM

**Honourable mentions to the entire Toronto Blue Jays team but ESPECIALLY Lawrie, Rasmus, Bautista, Thames, Arencibia, Johnson, Escobar, Romero & Mathis. Daaaaaaaaaaamn.

My Body’s a Zombie For You

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This message was received by a very dear friend of mine. Just read it. JUST…….read it.

A legit OKCupid message to my friend.

*single blink with a side of CALL 9-1-1!!!*

P.S. Ryan Gosling can sing to me any morning, afternoon or night. Swooooooon! Check out ALL of his band’s stuff: Dead Man’s Bones